The Benefits of Self Mentorship

Why would you consider self mentorship? You know yourself best, so sometimes the best advice can come from you. However, we don't always take the time to do the work.   

Self mentorship also helps when you have a mentor or are mentoring someone else. If you have taken the time to find a mentor and set up mentoring calls, you will want to maximize the outcome and respect your mentor's time.   

After you establish a Mentorship, the first conversation will include where you are today, your goals, and what your questions are.  

This means you need to know these things. It helps to write your goals down and have a summary of your situation.   

But what if you are not sure about your goals or want to 'check in' to make sure they are your current objectives? The process of testing your personal roadmap is 'self mentorship'. Of course, you can always check in with a trusted friend or your spouse as well.

So learning to be a good self mentor can be part of anyone's life skill. Learning to trust yourself and taking time to reflect is important.

So how to improve this skill?

How to be a good Self Mentor

Self mentorship does not mean self-critical. It is not meant to devalue the life you have built, your work or your choices. After all, you are still you, and those things have helped make you who you are.  

The idea is not meant to “blow up your life” but to give your life more focus so that you can be intentional in your direction and decisions. 

It may be as simple as listening to your “other half”. Many researchers point to the right and left brain concept to explain our preferences, career choices, and dominant hand. 

It is well known that diversity can improve performance in teams. If you considered this right/left concept was simply areas of personal diversity. The process of considering your non-dominant skills or preferences could be a way to consider your self. An alternative mirror image of you. This can bring insights to your thinking that you may have not previously considered.

And in the end, whenever you receive trusted advice or insight, it is a good idea to put it through your own “quality review”: to make sure the advice fits the situation and fits your personality. After all, what works for one person may not work for another. So self mentorship can be a way of testing ideas and advice that you are considering. And one of the best ways I have found to develop my personal “self mentorship” is the future self-journey. 

The Future Self Journey

This Journey is a process of self-discovery. It can create clarity, address or raise questions, and help to define priorities.  

Because of the nature of the process, I find that it helps to listen rather than read the process. For this purpose, I have created a “guided journey” video. It will take you about 7 mins. Or keep reading below for the transcript of the video.  

Either way, I hope you do have a listen, and please let a comment here or in the video with your thoughts. And maybe something about your insights, goals, or first action.  

It is my hope to create a supportive community to help each other with self mentorship and encourage each person's path.

I was first introduced to this personal insight building method as part of IBM's executive sales training in the 2000s. It was eye-opening. As a born “pleaser,” I was often making choices at work based on others' goals, not my own.   

This process started me on a path I am still on today. And I honestly can say, though I had, what seemed at the time, ambitions that I didn't know how I would realize, I have because the vision of my future self has stayed very real and present in my day to day life. It shaped decisions in subtle and large ways. And finally, when enough of the small actions had been taken, it allowed me to make some of the larger decisions. Today, I can say I am living my Future Self defined in 2007.  

I hope this moment creates a future vision and path the same for you.

For some, this idea is labeled as hypnosis or meditation. It is meditative in that you are thinking deeply and differently. You are taking another perspective — yourself in the future, versus you as you are today.

But this is a Journey you are in full control of. Let your mind wander, explore ideas and thoughts. But also stay authentic to your true self. And with that, let's start your Journey.

The Future Self Journey Script

If you want to read instead of listen to the Journey - read on. But take some time in-between each section to relax, think, and feel what messages your ‘future self’ has for you.

Prepare your mind 

Today we are going to see the person we really want to be.

This may be only a course correction or something much more fundamental. But I hope you will give a moment to listen to your inner self - and take the Future Self Journey. Let's get started.

So take a moment.

Today you are going to take time for yourself to think about the future.

In our day to day life, we often don't think about our future, not really.  

We often are focused on tasks.

- The kids need this.

- Work needs that.

- Is it time to start dinner?

But now, buy out time for yourself. To think about what is important to you and your future.

Likely if you know the answers to things question, you know the answers as well. At least enough of the answers to get started in removing roadblocks to self-doubt or building bridges to a happier you.

By listening to your future self: You are the person you want to be.

Your relationships, work, and life are different.

Because You are different — you are living your best version of yourself.

Imagine what could be, a future for yourself. 

In this moment — we are going to find power in the future.

The Future is not the place you are going. It is the place you create for yourself.  

In order to prepare your mind for self-reflection, we need to first prepare your space. You may want to clear the area of distractions. Get ready to take notes after the exercise - on your phone or with pen and paper.

But for now - try to find a private, quiet place. A setting where you can be calm. If you need a moment, start again when you are ready.

Get into a comfortable position. Make sure you're sitting in a way that will allow you to be focused for the next few minutes.

Imagine. You are looking at the entire earth. A blue globe hanging in space. Right now you are far away, but you are quickly flying toward it.

As you fly close, you start to see details — oceans and mountains. 

You see a high mountain in the distance, and you fly closer. As you come to the Mountain, you see an Eagle slowly flying over a misty stand of woods, and you follow him.

As the sun melts the mist away, you see a lone person standing in the center of the clearing. They are looking up, waiting for you.

As you land in the clearing and walk toward the person, you realize it is you — but older. 

They look happy and healthy and fully present. As they embrace you, you feel warm and loved. 

As you part from your warm embrace — you realize you are standing at a moment many years in the future.  

You start to notice your Future Self. 

How do they stand?

What do they look like?

How do they make you feel?

Questions for your Future Self 

What do I need to pay attention to most right now in my life?

What roadblocks are standing in my way that only I can remove?

What other advice would you give me?

What other question do you have for your Future Self?

What do you want to say to your Future Self?

As you say goodbye to your Future Self, you thank them for sharing their wisdom.  

As you open your eyes, you feel more focused about the future and ready to make plans to make it a reality. 

Reflect on your Future Self 

So now, let's reflect and make some notes:

Don't just do dream it, do it

Send yourself an email or write a letter telling yourself about today and making your promise to take action on behalf of your future self.  

Be specific. Make your plans Specific, Actionable, and Timebase. 

And get started, do one action this week, even today, that moves you along that path.  

Do something today that your future self will thank you for.

Thank yourself for taking this journey

I hope you have discovered something of value about yourself and your future. Share your goal with someone and make it real. Keep it in mind as you move forward to work toward that future aspiration.

What did you think of your Journey? Did you make a plan? Please comment below so that I can encourage you (it’s always a good idea to share your goal to make it real).

Please share in the comments below and encourage others on their personal journey’s.